Frequently Asked Questions

What is the dress/conduct code for the dance? 

Gentleman’s Dress Code: Dress shirt, slacks (NO jeans), tie, dress socks, dress shoes (NO tennis shoes). A suit or tux is welcome but not required. This is a formal ball, so please dress accordingly. Gentleman’s Code of Conduct: The gentleman will ask the lady to dance, not the other way around. After the dance, he will escort the lady off the dance floor.A gentleman is encouraged not to dance with a lady more than two times unless he is engaged or married to her. (Fathers excepted.)

Lady’s Dress Code: Formal dress or skirt, ankle length or longer. (No strapless tops.) Midriff and cleavage must be covered. Dress shoes equal to the task of zealous dancing or ballet slippers. Lady’s Code of Conduct: A lady adorns herself with finery and jewels and a cheerful, humble spirit.  The lady may politely decline a gentleman’s offer to dance without explanation.

I missed the registration deadline because (fill in the reason).  Could you make an exception and let me attend?  The deadline is Friday night at midnight, the night before the ball.  Because there are inevitably those who miss the deadline, as of May, 2018 and going forward to future balls, you may pay $30 cash for a ticket the day of the ball, as long as the ball is not sold out.

Can I get a refund?  Yes.  All ball tickets are now purchased online and easy to refund.  Stuff happens and I am happy to refund your money for any reason.  In fact, I don’t need an explanation.  Just email and request a refund.

My son/daughter will turn twelve soon after the ball. Can he/she attend?I am delighted that your son or daughter is so anxious to attend the ball.  I also have a daughter who had to wait (painfully and with much pleading) through 10 dances to attend.  But, as I told  her ‘no’, I say no to your request as well.  Why?  For several reasons:  The event is meant to be a place where teens can gather socially and learn dance and etiquette.  They tend to not want to do that with what they perceive as “little kids”.   Those younger than twelve are sometimes not as mature socially.  Girls tend to cluster and giggle because they are not yet ready to handle formal interaction with the opposite sex in a mature way.  (Boys too.)  Also, twelve years is  a minimum to give a reasonable boundary for coordination and an ability to follow directions.  While there are no doubt exceptions to these observations and even less maturity in some who are older, twelve gives a tangible place to set a limit.   I told my daughter it’s a “coming of age” event; something to look forward to.   I hope you will be able to encourage your son or daughter to look forward to it as well.

May I bring a nursing baby/toddler?  I love babies and toddlers!  While the long answer is varied by situation, the short answer is no.

I just want to watch.  Do I have to pay?  Yes.  I have no way to tell who is supposed to be dancing and who is supposed to be watching.  Inevitably, a daughter or son will pull parents onto the floor to dance and then you’re no longer a spectator.  Also, there is limited room.  The more spectators that attend, the fewer dancers can attend.  I do allow parents and friends to watch only the Grand March without payment or dressing formally.  After all it’s quite grand and I know you want a photo opportunity! (But then I kick you out:)

I have a child younger than 12 who wants to be a spectator.  Is this allowed? No.  For the same reason dancers must be 12.

I just want to watch.  Do I have to attend the practice?  Please email me and ask for an exception.

I just want to watch.  Do I have to dress formally?  Yes.  The ladies and gentleman dressed in their finery are part of the decorations of the dance.  I am trying to create a formal atmosphere where conduct and dress are turned up a few notches.  Thanks for your understanding.

We don’t have the appropriate clothing for the dance ( a dress too short, no slacks etc. ).  Can we attend in colored jeans, a knee length skirt etc.?  No.  For the same reason listed in the previous question.

Is this just for teenagers?  The ball is attended mostly by teenagers but it is intended to be a multi-generational event.  I encourage mothers and fathers to come with their teens.   Parents, it may surprise you how much fun you will have.

I can’t attend practice, can I still come to the ball?  Practice is mandatory and attendance is required for both newcomers and veterans to the ball.  Newcomers need to learn and experienced ball attendees need to refresh and make it easier for newcomers.   What makes the ball so fun is that everyone can move and dance as they are instructed with good timing.  When people don’t know the dances it frustrates those who do and makes it less fun for everyone.  If you have previously been to the ball, I will make an exception for a legitimate reason. Please email me at and ask for an exception. No matter how many times you have been to the ball, you still need an exception to miss practice.